February 3, 2004
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Pissed-Off Art Teacher
Last week in school the kids designed their own album art for a design project. We had spent the prior week pretending we were uber-illustrators, and made cheesy greeting cards and a series of illustrations on a revamped version of Little Red Riding Hood. They came out pretty good- although I ended up with a whole caboodle of Yu-Gi-Oh-styled Big Bad Wolves, there was one outstanding rendering of Lil’Red in a J-Lo suit. With a diamond tennis bracelet. Faboo.
Anyway. Last week I made up this kickarse mix CD for them to listen to, named it “Happy”, and I told them to make up their own DJ names for the cover. Since I work at a special-ed therapeutic treatment program, I was super super super-duper to compile only “appropriate” G-rated tracks, so DJ Swanky Fresh Eddie in the 5th grade and Miss Thang JJ-Swing hailing from da 6th Grade Haus wouldn’t get into hot water for grooving to the beats after skool, yo. Some highlights:
Bob Marley – 3 Little Birds
The Beatles – Yellow Submarine
The Flaming Lips – Tangerine
Macy Gray – Hey DJ
David Bowie & Queen- Under Pressure
Cheryl Crow – Soak Up the Sun
Some crazy Brazilian steel drum instrumentals
and so on.
I checked all the lyrics, looked up different versions online, and screened them for any sketchy, offensive, or sexual / romantic references. I checked every song- I mean, EVERY song- about three times. I even re-auditioned the ones with no words, just in case some saucy beat or sultry melody was too “provocative”. Sure that it was gonna be a clean, funky fresh and fun time, I went ahead burned ‘em on cd.
We listened to the whole thing in class, half one day, and the rest for the next time the class came to art, and this was for six separate groups of kids. We danced a little, sang along to the stuff we knew, and all in all ended up with a finished project which included the disc, a custom designed label for said disc, a cover, and insert sleeve with things like the imaginary recording label, track listings, and phat pretend DJ-name of the designer. All in a matching plastic jewel-case. You couldn’t find anything better shrink-wrapped for $13.99 at Newbury Comics, that’s for sure.
The kids were wicked psyched. I mean, who doesn’t like getting free music? And just for making art? Rock on!
That is, until the weekend. I found out on Monday morning that all of the discs and artwork had been confiscated from the kids who live in the dormitories, because some of the lyrics were allegedly “INAPPROPRIATE.”
What?!?
I spent the rest of the day in a panic. I couldn’t meet with my supervisor about it right away because we were short staffed, so I spent hours and hours second- guessing and mulling over what could have possibly been so offensive. I was angry with myself, humiliated at my supposed screw-up, and pissed at the rest of the staff at school for leaving me in the dark about what actually happened, and for not returning the discs or speaking to me directly.
The principal took my CD home with her last night to double check, which apparently no one else had done, and it turns out that everything was actually okay, and my compilation was as squeaky-clean as I thought. I felt a little redeemed this morning when I found out. But so far, the other grownups (I hate them, hate hate hate them today) are being indecisive as to whether they will return my students’ art, or at least admit they were wrong, nevermind apologize to me or the kids. And that is what makes me the most angry, because this is absolutely unjust- To me, to the students, and to the school. I could go on a mile long rant about the Dictatorial Reign of Lazy Stubborn Bossy Adults, but that is another thing for another time. I just want what’s fair.
Grr.
Comments (7)
Woah. Sometimes it doesn’t matter how hard you try-you can’t please everybody…Espcially as a teacher. Sometimes I think that they’re trying to quelch all the creativity out of these little guys. I’m glad your principal listened to it and supported you. That’s huge. That’s awesome. Nomatter, I’m pretty sure those kids appreciate all the hard work you put into the music, even though they have no idea all of the mental anguish and worry it put you through.
some people are just morons, plain and simple. tehy suck Suck SUCK.
I could go pee on the door of the teachers’ lounge for you, if you think that would help.
and i’ll hover over each of the constipated ones and zorch them with my carbonizer ray. no real harm, it’ll just make their hair messy and faces all carbony. and they’ll cough once and smoke will come out.
That’s why you need a flamethrower in your desk.
some people take control too far….. that sucks you had to second guess yourself and worry over nothing!!! poo on them.
this idea was amazing. I know I would’ve paid more attention in art if I got to make cd covers. oh wait. I did get to make cd covers… I just never got a cd.
there is a problem with censorship in the system, and it’s truly disgusting, the heights to which it’s being taken. and it makes me SO angry to know that perfectly clean things are being confiscated for no good reason.
but for future reference, it is generally a good idea to check with them damn authority figures before distributing anything. I mean, you had NO reason whatsoever to think that you’d need to check, hell these songs are cleaner than three paragraphs of me ranting, but… those punkass censors out there do technically have control.
I do hope you get this all sorted out, though.